Hi could you explain this please?

but I am so sad now, I feel this whole world hates me because of me being poisoned which lead to a brain injury, I cry out to Jesus and ask him every day but still no answer, I've always wondered what was I poisoned with and what's the cure? I wanna know so bad, I wanna go back to normal and lead a normal life but I just can't, I cry a lot, I am sorry for being a liar, I am sorry for doing evil stuff, I wanna know so bad what I was poisoned with and the cure, an evil man poisoned me when I did nothing, but what was I poisoned with, this evil man wants to hurt me really bad and manipulate me, so I avoid that person and forget that ever happened...